If you've struggled with overweight / obesity issues, chances are, you too have had to struggle with your inner fat self on multiple occasions. Usually, I can manage to fight off my inner fat self when she appears and makes stupid suggestions, such as "don't go to the gym today" and, "Have that extra plate of pasta".
Today, however, my inner fat self came to the forefront and was driving me crazy all. day. long.
I know why too:
I have taken on too much, i've got a super full plate with no end in sight, and I literally do not know how on earth I am going to accomplish all of these projects I've signed myself up to be accountable for.
This is when Fat Lisa emerges and slides her way into my consciousness! That beotch!
When I am stressed and / or panicked by the ridiculous amount of work I have waiting for me to finish, I go into "victim mode", meaning I pity myself, so much so that fat Lisa comes around to tell me that I deserve to take a break from the gym and that I deserve to have another piece of cheese - because dammit - I work hard and from hard work should come rewards!
Now, I know better (now) that this is no reward - this mentality is what got me to 100 pounds over weight! But man, oh man, is fat Lisa ever convincing! She did manage to persuade me to overeat my daily points today by 8 points *sigh* - but she didn't keep me from the gym. She tried so hard to get me to stay home and "relax" but nope - Healthy Lisa faught from the depths of my subconscious and punched fat Lisa in the face to buy me enough time to run my arse over to the gym. While at the gym for my hour cardio workout, fat Lisa resisted every second of the workout - which made it really difficut and made me sweat more than ever before - but I did it - the full hour - despite the nagging voice of fat Lisa.
Inner struggles are the worst - and I don't think there will ever be a way to get rid of this fat Lisa inside me - I just wish she would STFU!
Just another thing I am going to have to master and manage throughout the rest of my life... Good thing I have a blog to vent :) Thanks for reading!
Oh man, I hate Fat Cass too! What in the world is with this whole rewarding ourselves with food I'd like to know. Because I work hard I deserve to be fat? Makes no sense. Sounds like your winning the battle though!! :)
ReplyDelete"This is when Fat Lisa emerges and slides her way into my consciousness! That beotch!" This made me laugh out loud!
ReplyDeleteGreat post, I know that fat Michelle tends to win most internal battles..working on that :S